Saturday, 14 December 2013
All you have to do is Like my Facebook Page here.
follow me on Twitter here. (Optional)
And comment below telling me what you have asked Santa for this year ;).
Open to Mainland UK Only.
Winner will be chosen at random on Monday 16th December 2013 at 9pm
The DVD will be posted 1st Class recorded Tuesday 17th December 2013. If you are not home to sign it will be at your local delivery office.
This giveaway away is in no way associated with Anybody.
I cannot take respinsibility for prizes lost/damaged during transit. Im sending it signed for in a hope to avoid any issues.
Good luck everyone. Dont forget to share with your friends ;)
Friday, 13 December 2013
Entering our 4th year of TTC baby no2 and, well, ive given up hope but I'm still not ready to give up trying and yes I know that makes no sense.
Reasons for giving up hope are, hubby and I literally get no time together. Our 4 year old still sleeps with me and has stopped sleeping 7pm -11pm recently which used to be our bit of time together (when he wasnt on lates or sleep ins) but now C is up and down like a yo yo and some nights I wonder why I even bothered climbing the stairs to bed. The lack of sleep and our 8 hours of 'us' time a week seems to have left us bickering worse than ever and we are really good bickerers ;) (is that even a word?).
The other reason is probably clear from the picture in this post. I had just 3 complete cycles in 2013. Just 3 chances to conceive the precious bundle I so desperately long for.
The first cycle of 2014, because of their longevity, began of the 1st Dec 2013. This cycle im taking the usual Sanatogen mum to be and mumomega and hubby is continuing his wellman reproduction. But this cycle I am also taking inositol which seems to becoming a popular product in the PCOS community and you can read more about it here. I will also Finally be using the kit that was sent to me by the fine people at Zestica.
Today is CD13 so I still have a long way to go going by this years cycles.
Who knows what 2014 will bring.
Saturday, 7 December 2013
If you have ever seen Harry Potter you can probably remember Mrs Weasly screeching that when Ron, Fred and George came back from rescuing Harry in the second film.
So where HAVE I been?
I believe I left you a little stranded just before our appointment with the fertility consultant and life just kind of took over and the blog has been abandened.
Well it turned out I do in fact have PCOS. I know I was a bit peeved after being told I didnt have it but never mind. Hubby is a ok though so I guess thats something. We've been discharged though until I have lost weight. No real guidence or support just "lose weight and if no luck in 12 months come back".
I did feel good on the day but since then I feel like I have kinda been left t to swim in a lake of black tar. I feel completely alone. Stupid I know.
I did join a couple if PCOS groups on facebook but thr women are so low, practically suicidal from all the symptoms and the no luck conceiving. I feel so awful for them. Im so lucky to have just one child. But this longing- I just cannot seem to shift it.
What else has happened? Well C turned the big 4 today. Cannot believe he will be starting school in 9 months.
I think thats all for now. I do have giveaways and reviews to sort out but I think I may leave them until the new year now. Something for you all to luck forward too. ;)
Tuesday, 15 October 2013
August and September are always hard for us. Every year's the same as we remember our Angel's anniversaries tensions get fraught and this year the 26th September marked 3 years since our last loss. Our 'rice' as the baby was nicknamed. The last piece of our puzzle, our perfect age gap, our souls were destroyed that day.
Many of you will have been in similar circumstances I'm sure. Losing a baby, at any stage, changes everything. The way you feel about about yourself, each other, the guilt, the grief, the what if's? Even though people tell I should be grateful for what I have and move on, I can't. Intact it's one of my most hated statements ever. 'Move on'? Never. Gonna. Happen.
This year has been probably the worst so far. There was so much anger and hate in this house and I felt so neglected with hubby working so much I just couldn't take it anymore and I thought the best thing to do was leave. I applied for a housing association home near my mother and got all mine and C's important documents ready and I really was ready to leave.
I didn't leave.
I wasn't scared, I had plenty of support around me so the transition would have been relatively easy, for me. I have no idea how C would have responded. That did scare and worry me a little.
Nothing in life is easy though is it. Grieving for a baby you wanted so desperately certainly isn't easy. Even 3 years later.
It has been worth staying though, I think, for now. I am slowly actually putting some effort into rebuilding myself. Forcing myself to talk to people and I have been pleasantly surprised by the outcome.
And the good news? We see our fertility consultant for the first time on the 31st October. I cannot wait to get this process going and hopefully give C a little Bro or Sis SOON!! Six months of almost non stop tests has definitely been worth it :).
Join us on Facebook www.facebook.com/BroodyNews (giveaway coming soon!!)
and Twitter www.twitter.com/BroodyNews
Monday, 5 August 2013
My mum came by yesterday with a surprise up her sleeve. It's been a hard year in lots of ways, ways we don't talk about to anybody, but my mum declared that she wanted to pay for a break for us to give us something to look forward too, a 3 night weekend break in October - to Butlins. We literally could not be more grateful for this and are really excited. It's going to do us all the world of good and as my mum paid for the premium dining package also we've not got to worry about trying to find to much spending money, after all there is plenty of free things for Charlie to do all day and all the way up to bedtime and then some!
I will do more blog posts on the run up to our break away. We've been to Butlins twice since Charlie was born and its great family break away in the UK.
Wednesday, 31 July 2013
Tuesday, 30 July 2013
Wednesday, 17 July 2013
I find it crazy to think that if my Great, Great Grandmother was alive now she wouldn't recognise half of the food we eat today. We're living in a world now where we're looking more for convenience and forgetting about our health. A £2 pizza and a £1.47 bag of oven chips that can cook in less than 20 minutes over a chicken, potatoes and vegetables that not only take time to prepare but can take anything up to 2 hours to cook and costs more towards the £7 mark seems so much more appealing both financially and time wise in our current time poor money even poorer (I know, no extra marks for good English here!) lives.
I love a Sunday roast as much as anyone. But the preparation, the time, and even the cost sometimes can put me off a little. Then there's the mountain of washing up, which hubby does most of the time, but it just fills me with dread. 3 hours of my day when I have a child, studying, cleaning and numerous other things to deal with...... that pizza looks incredibly appealing right now right?
Despite the fact I am overweight, trying for a baby, tired all the time and no one would look at me and think 'well she's radiant and looks fantastic she must eat well' it doesn't stop me from taking shortcuts with food.............................90% of the time! I always make sure Charlie eats well. There is always fruit for him etc but when it comes to me (and hubby when he's here) I just seem to have completely lost my passion for good food. Despite my now size 26, miserable, painful, aching frame convenience seems to win hands down more often then I care to account for.
Then I saw this. Ignoring the fact its in the Daily mail I was just stunned. They can literally make ANYTHING into a 'ready' meal. This product is the icing on the cake for me. Although commuters and those who take an early breakfast at there office desk seem to approve of this 'ready made boiled egg' it does seem to have created quite a store amongst the majority. This product begs the question, how far is to far when it comes to convenience foods? Has this company gone and taken the last innocent food left in the world and made it into something that will make us feel like we've been naughty after we've consumed it. A bit like a cottage pie from the freezer aisle? or are those that are disgusted with the product just a little neurotic and have to much time on there hands if they have time to worry about something like a ready made egg? Needless to say the eco warriors of the world are not to happy about the product either.
Personally I think we need to find a way to go back to basics. Food is out of control. You can quite literally buy anything processed and modified in some way these days, generally full of preservatives and nasties now. The egg isn't even safe from greedy manufacturers grubby money grabbing hands.
Tuesday, 25 June 2013
Do you ever just sit back and wonder when a bit of luck may come your way? That's what I was doing last week when I rang the docs last week and then the receptionist told me my blood results and then said "Oh your scan results are back too- do you want them?" and suddenly the world stopped spinning.
"No action required" she said.
Well that's amazing I thought. No more needles or scans until hubby has had his sperm analysis.
"I'll make you an appointment to come and discuss the findings with a doctor"
And just like that she burst my bubble. Like the pic? It's stolen from google. Good isn't it?. Anyway, lots of questions were swimming round my head at the moment and well you know me I never process anything that effectively and for a few minutes I did panic a bit. Then I was left feeling a bit what the......? (feel free to insert your own swear word here, remember it's a family blog though people!).
So as it stands all my bloods are 'normal', a few cysts were picked up on the scan but I was reassured that they were of no concern at the moment, but I guess I'll find out more Friday. There were 'a few cysts' on my ovaries when I was scanned back in 2008 when we were struggling to conceive last time but I have conceived twice since then. Even if one did end in miscarriage so how much trouble could they be causing? Well? You don't know do you? Nor me. Roll on Friday.
Hubby's sperm analysis is the 2nd of July. If that comes back normal too I'm curious to know what happens next. Will we lose our place in the fertility clinic? Is that it we just give up? Keep trying? What? Who knows.
It's amazing the effect all this has on a marriage though. For all the women I have spoken too this process either brings them closer together or they drift slightly apart [from their husbands], only during the testing phase when everything is all up in the air and unknown. I'm sad to say we are the latter. I have never quite felt so distant from my husband as I do right now. More my fault then his, my desire for another child is quite literally taking over all that I am, and him? Well I think he's OK. He's happy and feels lucky to have Charlie as he got what he has always wanted. A son name Charlie. Me? I seem to be unable to shake this NEED to give Charlie a sibling, someone to play with, grow up with, rely on when they are older and hubby and I are no longer here. I seem to have this ache constantly inside of me that I just can't shake off. Like I am MEANT to have more babies, but just can't. Then I am hit with the guilt and shame of being so desperate for another baby when there's women out there going through this exact same process that don't even have one, that have never even seen a positive pregnancy test. Then for a brief time I think 'what will be will be' and then as quick as you can imagine the aching and longing come back again..........
Tuesday, 4 June 2013
|Pic source: Google|
Time ticked by and I patiently waited for for either a positive OPK or a visit from Aunt Flo (sorry guys reading this). Neither came. In fact they still haven't on cycle day 114!!!! Yes you did read that write and no it isn't a miss print I actually mean cycle day One Hundred and Fourteen! **Faints**.
So cycle day 103 after a tearful and emotional night hubby took himself down to the doctors at 8.15am and basically told the doctors receptionist that he wasn't leaving until I was seen. Alas, they gave him an appointment for me for that day at 10.20am. I took my mother- in- law in for back up in case I broke down and didn't make sense. This doctor like the last one listened and said there was more tests that can be done and I left that day with another form for more bloods (eeeep, needles *faints again*) and also a referral for a scan and the promise of a referral to a specialist. Woo hoo. The scan has come through already but I will probably have a wait for the specialist appointment.
I am still waiting for the second lot of blood results. But the doctor did prescribe me something called Utovlan which will apparently bring on a visit from Old Aunt Flo after the 10 day course. We'll see. For now things are feeling bleak but hopeful, if that's even possible? Bleak because this time 3 years ago I was just about to fall pregnant with what should have been my fourth baby and 3 years on we're still getting nowhere and my dream of close age gaps has all but fizzled out now. But hopeful because at least things are getting done. If you have any stories about your fertility I would love to here them. Hopeful, sad, happy endings all welcome. Supplement recommendations etc are also welcome. I love hearing about every ones experiences.
|The drug of hope ;)|
Thursday, 16 May 2013
Last night I sat down to draw the winners of the most recent giveaway when my internet decided to crash at 5 minute intervals so i eventually gave up!
This morning I have decided to draw names out of a hat as it's easier and keeping you lot waiting isn't fair.
So for this giveaway liking, sharing and making me laugh earned you entries. All those entries turned into your names being copy and pasted onto pages of paper which I ripped up, folded and popped in Charlie's sunhat.
The first name to come out of the hat and therefore the winner of the Peachy Green nappy - brand new but from my very own stash is.........
Hope you enjoy your prizes ladies. More Giveaway's will be happening soon so please keep an eye on my Facebook page :D
Wednesday, 1 May 2013
So we will
|picture taken from ebay listing that I bought from. |
Last year the in-laws came down for the day but next year they will be coming for the whole holiday! Charlie cannot wait. He remembers billy and cannot wait to go on the big slide in Bob's yard. Last year he was poorly whilst we were there so we didn't get to do anything in the evening so I hope we get more time to see the entertainment next yer. I've popped a couple of photo's below of Charlie at Butlins last year :D.
ROLL ON 2014. It's going to be a good year :D.
|Charlie having his picture taken with Barney 2012 (we had the professional shot made into a keyring :D)|
|Charlie and Billy, Billy got into trouble just after this picture was taken as you aren't supposed to take pictures with the characters. Woopsies. We didn't know but we do now! Sorry Billy x|
Sunday, 21 April 2013
I have 2 great prizes up for grabs for those of you wanting to carry on the Real nappy fun. 1 Lucky winner will receive this Brand New Peachy Green in Farmyard print (one size and comes with insert) with 2 Bandana bibs and a lucky runner up will receive 10% discount code for their own use at www.tinynippers.co.uk so if you didn't manage to stock up on ecosprout or anything else for that matter this week, then do not despair!
All you have to do is pop over and like my Facebook page!
Like Tiny Nippers Facebook page!
Comment below - Hi is enough but if you can make me laugh (I'm being a grumpy guts today) you'll get an extra entry ;)
The give away will end on May 14th at midnight and a winner announced within 24 hours.
The winners prize will be posted signed for by Royal mail.
Terms for the Tiny Nippers prize are simply that it is not used in conjunction with any other offer and that the code is used within 4 weeks of reciept. If the order amounts to over £50 exc. p&p, postage will be free.
Any details you give me in conjuntion with this offer will be destroyed immediately once you receive your prize and will not be passed on to or sold to third party companies for any reason.
Thursday, 4 April 2013
Normally I get brushed off as emotionally unstable (still grieving for last baby), to fat, not enough symptoms, too young to be worrying (I am 24 this month), got plenty of time blah blah blah, But today. Today was different. I was welcomed into a room with a warm smile by a doctor with all the right body language, weird?, perhaps but normally I am welcomed by stiff boards who just want you in and out and look at me as if thinking "oh look the chubby ones back again, still not pregnant, lets make her feel like crap" - even if this is not so, it's how I'm made to feel. Today's doctor however turned to me, not just her head but her whole body, despite running over half an hour late (there was an emergency to deal with I believe) she made me feel as if she had all the time in the world.
She listened intently to my desires, my desire that I wanted to finish my family before I finished Uni so that when i go back into the working world every penny I earn can be spent cherishing the children I have been blessed with and I wanted to be young enough to enjoy them and that I never wanted such a big age gap and would have preferred to have several close together. I am more realistic now in that my big family won't happen but I told her I just want one more chance, a chance to give Charlie a sibling, to do they 'baby thing' one more time.........and she smiled.
Now please don't think me ungrateful. I know how blessed I am to have 1 child but my ovaries? my heart? my womb perhaps? are screaming for a baby. Charlie constantly asks for a baby sister (I think this is more influenced by the fact people assume we want one of each and always saying sister around him - this is not the case, I just want to be PREGNANT!!) and my whole body just aches for the whole process, the pregnancy, the labour, the breastfeeding, the nappies, oh how I love my teeny tiny cloth nappies that i have been stashing away for 2+ years, then there's the first smile, the first time they vomit in your hubby's mouth when he fly's them around like aeroplanes, you wouldn't think they would make the same mistake twice but they do, and so on and so forth. I imagine it's the same feeling women get when they hit 35 and suddenly their body clock is ticking, mines just ticking much earlier than normal!.
She was honest and heart warming and above all thoroughly reassuring and said she was more than willing to help at least see if there is anything wrong with me, but I have to do my bit. I HAVE to shift some weight. So that is what I will do, for real this time because now it's really worth something and I am no longer stuck in my black cloud. On Monday I have to have some blood taken. What happens from that point is yet to be seen but it is a start. It is a step forward. There is no reason for me to hide anymore, whatever the tests reveal I need to move forward. Now just to get hubby to the docs for his sperm test.....wish me luck